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Mar. 21st, 2005 @ 01:27 am
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Four year later and here I still am.
Today, my best friend growing up should have turned 24.
But, he wont, and I have 9 more days till i hit the 2-4.
It kinda sucks, new years and this time of the year hurt like hell. But, i keep getting older and brandon is still 20 years old. 20 old and 4 underground.
does anyone even read this? I doubt it.
sometimes i feel old, sometimes i think about the old days. back when we were fishing all the time. back when the schaefer never ran out. back when things were fun. i miss that, i miss it all. but i am not upset with where i am at. i just miss it all, thats all. someone might understand. i miss the old days at leonard, i miss the fraternity basement, i miss the college dorm, i miss those days in high school when i thought i would never be like my dad, and now i miss the times to come when i wish i could have spent more time with him. i miss the nights at wolfies, and the nights at apones...
anyways, enough of this crap. let me know if you still read this.
nite.Current Mood: shitty Current Music: Pennywise - Bro Hymn Tribute |
It was yet another day at the nut factory.
Yup, thats work. The nut factory. Not in anyway does it mean that Emory University proudces any type of peanut, cashew, walnut, or anything like that.
We produce/house/nurture the sheer nuttiness/ignorance/idiocracy that is soon becoming the majority of people in the US. Whether it be the people that are employed there, the students that go to school there, or people that just sit around there. Start with the first group... those employed there. There are two "sets". Emory employees and Sodexho employees. Sodexho is the red-headed step-child of Emory, which Emory sexually assualts every Sunday. Everyday is Sunday. Apparently we are a step down in the social ladder. Its ok to verbally assault me for something that is in no way whatsoever my fault. Its ok to expect me to pull a vegetarian dish out of my ass when you did not order one. And once I do miracously pull this veggie meal out of my ass, proceed to tell me that it looks like shit and you want something else. If its your choice to not eat meat, its also obviously your choice to order a fucking vegetarian meal when you place your order. The students. Now here is the largest of people that I feel bad for. I feel bad for them, I envy them, I loathe them. I wish my parents would have sent me to a 30K a year school, bought me a Beamer, and told me that a 500 a week allowance is perfectly normal. But, I am also completely happy with who I have become, and I know that if I would have had all that shit handed to me, I would be a lot different. I like the fact that I can say I worked almost full time and still went to school. But, for christ's sake, when you see a 15 ft box truck backing up, common sense would say "HOLY SHIT LOOK OUT FOR THAT TRUCK!" Not in the least. I should be able to see that spot directly in the middle and 1 foot behind the truck. Or, when you see traffic on a four lane highway (Indiana folk think up there by wal mart), you would either a)find somewhere else to cross, or b) wait til there is no traffic. Not my luch at Emory. Even better is when the make a right turn from the left lane, and cut you off completely. Then the people that just sit there, usually they just get the cops called on them for trying to sexually harass the girls on campus. Ahh the girls, there are some hot ones... this is a conversation I had with my boss, a 40ish something year old woman...
Boss: "John, dont you think that girl is hot?"
John: "I do, but there is no point."
Boss: "No point?"
John: "Think about it, she goes to school here, bypassing the point that she more than likely has nothing interesting to talk about other than her allowance and her beamer, I do not have the time, energy, or the money to entertain that girl."
Boss: "I think you are right."
Ok, time for bed. nite.Current Mood:  tired Current Music: Operation Ivy - Knowledge |
Well, I post again.
Lets see what terribly new.
I was supposed to sign a lease renting a three bedroom townhouse. Girl put me off for several times on signing the lease, and then, she tells me that she decided to rent the place to several of her friends, and sorry for the inconvience.
Sorry, for, the inconvience.
Hmmm. Yeah. Livid was a good term to describe my anger at that time. Livid as in "I relaly oughta go choke that bitch" livid.
But, all things happen for some sort of reason, and I think I may have found a house to rent for about the same price, and its ten times better than her shitty townhouse.
I am still working an exorbarant amount of hours. I am loving my job less and less, although I still enjoy it from time to time. I am ready for a change, cause I feel I cant learn anything new where I am at. I either need more challenges, or a change of scenary.
The last post was a very drunken post. I wont delete it, cause I mean every last word of it, but it was a drunken one. I dont think that I am better than anyone. And I also think that I am no worse than anyone. We are all on the same playing field here, its just a matter of us as people deciding whether or not we want to make plays. I'm through with that holier than thou attitude. I carried it for a long time when i was in Indiana, and I left it there as well. You know what, I am glad I got out, and I am glad that it is just a place to visit. It may be home for some, but it was just temporary for me. My dad always asks me what other people from my high school are doing these days... My response is always, "I dont have the time to worry about what theyre doing, Im busy worrying about me." Ive accomplished more in a year and a half than I thought I would ever accomplish. I have made a name for myself with a company, and Im close to being able to start a real family. Enough about that. Time for work.Current Mood:  blank Current Music: Van Halen - Panama |
Wow, its been a long time.
A lot has gone on in the past 6 months.
I am sure that no one reads this anyways, so who cares.
My friend Justin moved down here. He lives on my couch in the one bedroom apt. Soon we are all moving to a 3 br townhouse. Rock.
Things are new around here. Lots of things are new to me. I havent felt rejection in a long time. Its been buggin me lately to IM someone from back in indiana lately. Someone that I havent talked to in a very long time. I did it, I talked for a few min, and then I got blocked. What the fuck? Tell you what, go ahead, preach on and on about how open you are, and how you only care about BLAH BLAH BLAH... but when someone who thinks the absolute world about you finally gets the balls to say something to you, dont patronize that person (me) and then block them (me again). Get off your high horse, and spend some time on us little people.
That is what I really love. The people that I thought were above that small-town mentality. They are truly wonderful... You think someone is past acting a certain way.... but yet, blah blah blah, why even fucking talk about it... You know what, I made the goddamn choice to take out my earings, my tongue ring, and all that shit and grow up and get a real job. My views on everything have not changed at all, and if anything, I have gained a little more attidude than ever. I am more indpendent than I ever thought I would be. You know what else??? I dont care...
But, I may add a link back into my profile for this journal... Let em all know what is going on... Who cares... More and more, I notice that i sound like my dad, whether i am typing or actually typing. I am glad... my dad is my hero.
Ugh. I cannot get over how irritated I am.. You know, sometimes I feel like giving up on it all. Fuck it, what does it all matter? Why do I bust my ass 80 hours a week just to make rent and bills? I could follow in the foot-steps of some friends and just stick that gun to my head, and not think twice... but why dont I? I am better than that, or so i keep telling myself..... You know what?... I am who I am, if you dont like it, I am sure that there is something you can go and fuck... oh wait... its yourself...Current Mood:  contemplative Current Music: Flogging Molly - Rebels Of The Sacred Heart |
Its Labor day, and I am sitting around waiting for the rain from the hurricane. Fun fun. I actually had three days off in a row. Truly a blessing. I wrecked my car. Long story, I will elaborate later on it. I have a 97 camry at home now, I just need my GA drivers liscense and time to go back and get in it. While my honda was sitting here wrecked at the complex, someone broke into it and stole my cd player. I am ready to bust skulls. Fuckers. Oh well, its time to cook, ill catch up with everyone and this thing later on.Current Mood:  skull busting Current Music: Sarcastics - 17+1 |
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Sorry for the lateness in this posts here.
I work more than ever. Sucks, but at least I know that I am headed in the right direction.
Donna moved in. Rock.
I promise I will post more on my one day off this week.
Reading Chap's journal made me miss Kanuga.
Nite.
Aug. 12th, 2004 @ 09:52 pm
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| » Where to start.. |
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Where should I really start? I am now a catering manager at Emory University in Atlanta Georgia. Donna is moving down here in about a month, and I am really excited about that. My job is awesome and I am happy for once. I am making a decent living, and soon will be starting something along the lines of a real life.
Some things that are new. I am now the proud owner of a wireless, 802.11G router. Yup, I am a dork, and I dont care. I have made friends with this girl down here named Heather. She is the closest thing I have to a best friend down here, and we have a lot in common. She misses her boyfriend back home in Alabama, and I miss Donna. I sometimes think that if things were different, I would go after her. That is not to be mistaken as I wish things were different so I could. I am the happiest I have been where I am at right now, but sometimes I just tend to think. I really cant wait for Donna to get here though. I think thats why I get along with Heather so well. We hang out so much, its kinda making up for the companionship that is lacking in my life right now. Its easier with her, cause she is nothing but a friend, so there isnt all that girlfriend shit to worry about. And, she cleans and does laundry, which is super awesome for me.
I work a lot at this new job. I really enjoy it for the most part though. I do tend to work long crazy hours, but its ok. Sometimes I get pissed at work, but thats OK too. I do have a lot to learn. However, when my boss talks to me like I am an idiot, I tend to get pissed. Last night really got to me though. I got to work around 7:45 AM so that I could get some of my other projects caught up. I then jumped right into things, and I worked my ass off all day. I swear I did not stop all day. Finally, at 11 at night when I was leaving, my catering director asked me if I had unpacked some palet of shit that she ordered. I told her that I had not, because I didnt have enough time. Well, bitch unlocked the store room and told me to unpack it. I was there til after midnite. Talk about fucking pain in the ass. Oh well, I just suck it up because I know I have to in order to where I want to eventually get to in this company. And unlike anywhere else I have ever worked, hardwork is repaid here. Ive seen it a hundred times already. I mean, look at me, I have only been with the company 6 months, and I have already gotten one promotion, and a decent raise. One day, I will run this company.
Other than that things are ok. I am happy, I have a good job, and I am on my way to something that resembles a real life. Who knows, maybe I will buy a house sometime soon. Probably not though, cause I dont plan on being in Atlanta for all that long. Who knows though? I sure dont.
Jun. 18th, 2004 @ 11:42 pm
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| » well........Well |
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Well, I am here in Atlanta. Sorry for the interuptions in posting. Eventually, if I ever get time, I will continue posting. I worked 16 hours today, and I am tired. I am off to bed, but I promise I will post more later.
Jun. 18th, 2004 @ 01:35 am
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| » I love it |
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I love it. I love that when I finally have a good nite, it ruins someone elses plans. Sorry if I had Donna all week... I wanted to see her again. God frobid if I find out where "girls nite out" is... You shouldnt have told me.... HA I love it.... well, its bed time... nite
May. 15th, 2004 @ 02:41 am
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| » hmmmmmm.... |
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Yes, I am still alive, sorry i havent posted in a while.
Donna was here, Donna left. I am sad. Very. I screwed up some good shit way back when, and repairing things like this suck. Really, really suck. Just so ya'all know, I am drunk. Not just drunk, but "trying to pack after a shitload of beer" drunk. Drunk is the only way to deal with putting 400 into the old honda. By the way, my car has no name. Please name it. Post comment somewhere on here, and it will be found.
*trying to stay on task* I really fucked shit up with Donna way back when. I was young, stupid, ignorant, etc... take your pick. I had it all, and know I have to continuely look back at myself throwing it all away. The first time I thought about it, I thought I was just lonely. Turns out I was wrong. Fuck it, I'll tell all to the journal. I fucking screwed up. I think about the one that got away, and realize that I am thinking about was the wrong one. All that shit that I think I missed out on, heh... I was wrong. I realize this now, and i can only hope that it is not too late. I put this all down here cause I am also coming to the realization that I have no ties to back home, and that is the way I like it. I like to be able to move on and not care. The less the amount of people that I care about the better... it makes it easier for me.
The car, the car, the car. Ug, fuel relay, and both cv joints. UGH! I could attempt it on my own, but I do not have the time, the resources, or the patientce (sp). It hurts twice as much cause I know this is way too much to pay for the repairs, but he is the cheapest in the area. *SHARP STABBING MOTHER FUCKING PAIN*
Well, post comments on here for the name of the car. Post comments here so that my shallow self knows that there is some support out there. And please post here if you have some sort of decent person you know in Atlanta, so I at least know someone there.
May. 14th, 2004 @ 03:44 am
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